Michael Jackson was nothing less than a gift to humanity.

That title would be the first and main reason for me to be a fan, although I didn't realize just how much emphasis he placed on humanity, mankind and the human condition until AFTER his death, sadly. His departure from this earth was the beginning of my real discovery of him as both an artist and a person. The end of his journey here has, in a way, started a new one of mine. . .

I have loved his singing and his music for as long as I can remember, although I never saw him in concert. I'm not a concert person, generally speaking, but prefer to hear music artists privately in my home or my car via CD. I'm sure Michael was fantastic in concert, but I would prefer a private serenade to being among thousands in a stadium. I refuse to admit to being claustrophobic, but I don't like dense crowds, small rooms or too many people around me. I need my space.

I love Michael's music and his dancing, and I can remember really enjoying "Rock with You," "Don't Stop Till You Get Enough" and "She's Out of My Life" as far back as 1980 or 1981, when I was exiting grade school and starting junior high. No need to really get into "Thriller," "Billie Jean" and "Beat It," which were the songs that permeated my final junior high school year and accented the start of high school for me. I can vaguely remember hearing the Jackson 5 while growing up. Michael was part of the basic fabric of my life. He was, if you'll pardon the expression, background music that was always *just there* - until the music died. Now, the silence is deafening.

I don't know what will fill the void that his absence has brought in not only my life but in the lives of so many other fans, including his dear friend Elizabeth Taylor's. Even she has felt the great pain of his premature demise and loss. How hard it must be for his closest friends and family members. Michael's life touched the lives of so many others.

When the sun breaks through on cloudy days, there will be one ray of light less, one sunbeam less, because Michael took it with him when God embraced him. . .Heaven has one ray of light more. We have one less.

Thank you for the gift of your music, your dancing, your singing, your humanitarian efforts, and your magic, Michael!

With love from the friend you never knew, the friend you never had, the one who didn't write the letter she might have written. . .please forgive me.
Carmen

~August 2009~